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Metropolis Reality Forums « HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes! »

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luci
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HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« on: Apr 29th, 2005, 12:04pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
Do any of you have a bald man joke stored anywhere?  I've searched all over the Internet and cannot find any.
My Search Engine is pooped form looking! Roll Eyes
 
A clean one will be appreciated and I need it before Monday.  Our Music Director loves to tell blonde jokes and I've promished him one day to get even.  We have a lunch on Monday and I'd like to be prepared with a  
joke for him!  Grin
 
Thanks in advance, I know one of you will come through for me on this one! Wink
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Jeff
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Get down tonight ;)

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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #1 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 12:14pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
I haven't seen any good ones, but here are three. The third is a bit racy, though.
 
- Are you really that bald or is your neck just blowing a bubble?
 
- What do you call lice on a bald man's head?  
Homeless.
 
- Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets?  
So he could run his fingers through his hair!
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #2 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:05pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
A woman was cutting her husband's thinning hair, when their teenage son arrived home looking for a snack. She offered a kiwifruit and tried to tempt him with its nutritious qualities. "It has more vitamin C than an orange," she remarked.  
"And more hair than Dad," added their son.
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #3 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:05pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
Karen: Have you noticed that Daddy is getting taller ?
Sharon: No, why ?
Karen: His head is sticking through his hair.
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #4 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:05pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
Doctor, doctor, can you give me something for my baldness?  
How about a few pounds of pig manure?  
Will that cure my baldness?  
No, but with that on your head no one will come near enough to notice you're bald
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #5 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:06pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
Why do bald-headed men never use keys?
Because they've lost their locks.
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #6 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:06pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
A bald man with one leg wanted to go to a fancy dress party but he didn't know what to go as. He wrote to a fancy dress company and asked for a recommendation.The reply came back saying that he could go as a monk becasue of his bald head. He replied angrily saying that they were just being rude about his bald head.
 
The company apologized and wrote back saying that he could go as a pirate, his bald head could be covered by the hat and his wooden leg would complemnt the outfit. He replied angrily saying they were just being rude about his wooden leg.  
 
A few days later he recieved a parcel with a note. In the parcel was a pot of sticky toffee and the note said smear the toffee over
your head, stick your wooden leg up your arse and go as a toffee apple
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #7 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:06pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
The Sunday School teacher asked if any of the children's parents had quoted from the Bible in the past week. Little Timmy paused, but then spoke up, "My daddy doesn't have any hair on his head. Daddy says that God put hair on everything that he was ashamed of."
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #8 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:06pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
After accepting an invitation to dance with a rather prematurely balding man a young woman wants to lighten the mood and says, "Honey, God was good to you, gave you a handsome face and room for another one."
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
Frank Sinatra
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #9 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:06pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
YOUR SO BALD THAT WHEN YOU WHERE A TURTLENECK YOU LOOK LIKE A ROLL ON DEODORANT.
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
Frank Sinatra
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Re: HELP!  I Need Bald Man Jokes!
« Reply #10 on: Apr 29th, 2005, 2:42pm »		 Quote Quote Modify Modify
As a man ages, it is natural that his hair starts thinning.
 
 It is a well-known fact that when a man is bald at the front
 of his head, it’s because he’s a great thinker.
 
 Also, when a man is bald at the back of his head, it’s
 because he’s sexy.
 
 Unfortunately, when a man is bald both front and back, he
 only thinks he’s sexy...
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
Frank Sinatra
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